Heart to Heart
by Penryn
Summary: After he comes back, Vash and Milly have a lil chat to catch up on a few things; Pleeeeaaaase Read and Review!


Disclaimer: No, I don't own Trigun or any of the characters, no matter how much I'd like to own Vash and Wolfwood....  
  
Vash walked determinedly through the desert heat. It had been a long time since he'd left his two friends to go confront his brother. It had been longer than he expected it to have been, if he had ever fully believed he'd be able to return. After his fight with his brother, he had decided it was time to stop being a child forever idolizing Rem as infallible. But he needed time to think things through for himself, away from everything. That... and helping Knives recover fully, which proved to be quite a bit harder than he'd anticipated. His body healed fine, as Vash knew it would, but trying to help him accept his faults and change his extremely skewed view on any life other than that of the two brothers was more challenging than any fight with any Gung-Ho Gun Vash had ever faced. It was truly rare for him to be so solemn and contemplative for such a great length of time. In the solitude of recovery, Vash was eventually able to get through to Knives.

----------

"You can't tell me that they're perfect; those weak, greedy, impossible life forms scurrying around like ants on this planet's surface," Knives had said, trying once again to prove how needless anyone else was.  
  
"No Knives, they're not perfect. But neither are we. No one is. Even we have 'scurried' around this planet, more so then most of them. We have shown weakness... we have even shown the greed you sneer at them for."  
  
Knives' eyes burned with fury from being accused of acting like a human in any way. "How dare y-"  
  
"What do you call trying to kill everyone? Every last person here but us... that was your plan. To take every life."  
  
"And where does my weakness lie? The only reason I'm here now is because my only equal, my only brother, managed to gain the upper hand on me in a fight. None of them have ever brought out a weakness in me."  
  
Vash sighed heavily; he'd heard this argument many times already. "You're wrong..."  
  
"Then tell me, since you seem to know so much, where is my weakness?" Knives spat triumphantly. This was an old dispute, it had been rolled around many times now, and always ended with Vash knowing nothing else to say but 'you're wrong'. He smiled to himself.  
  
Vash looked at him, and for some reason... he finally found words. Not nearly enough, but starting small was better then not starting. "Your pride."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Your weakness is in your pride. You think that we are above humans, that we are better, that they don't deserve to live on the same planet as we do. Don't you see? That's exactly what I've been running from all this time, humans with the same attitude towards me. That I'm below them, that I don't belong among their people and their homes. You are exactly like them."  
  
Knives looked at him stunned. He hated every word Vash said... hated it because... it was true?

----------

Vash smiled to himself as the town came into sight. An anxious feeling started growing in his stomach as he wondered what the reaction to his return would be. The people had been... less then hospitable on his final day or two there. Except for the insurance girls, except for Milly and Meryl, his friends. For some reason, thinking about them only made the jumpy feeling in his stomach grow. He decided that he wanted to surprise them, and so took the long way around the outskirts of the small town in order to sneak up on the tiny house.  
  
Creepy silently across the ground, he slipped in through the back door that led into the kitchen, even remembering to miss the squeaky second step. He stopped and breathed in for a moment, taking in the scent of the two women who had cared for him when he no longer cared for himself. He could smell them everywhere; the scent had almost become as familiar as the smell of gunpowder and grease. In the silence, he could hear movement coming from a bedroom and cheerful humming. A mischievous thought made his lips twitch into a grin, and he tiptoed toward the source. Slipping through the open door, he snuck up on the tall woman, looking the opposite direction, humming happily. Raising his hands, Vash was just about to give Milly the scare of her life, when a small sound caught his attention, and he looked down over her shoulder to find himself staring a small face... a baby??  
  
"Huh?!"  
  
"WHAAAAA!!!!!!"  
  
In a split second's time, Vash found himself laying in a heap on the floor, in a world of hurt as Milly towered over him, clenched fists held in an awkward but ready position.  
  
"Heeeey, what did ya have to do that for?" Vash whined up at her causing Milly to gasp.  
  
"M-m-mister Vash??"  
  
Vash rolled over, rubbing the back of his head and smiled up at her. "Yeah... sorry, I thought I might surprise you guys but..." he stopped as he heard small grunts and cooing on the table above.  
  
"I'm so sorry! I had no idea that you would be arriving back today! Although I guess I should have been expecting it, seeing as how you told Meryl you'd come back, and you wouldn't break a promise," she beamed one of those huge smiles of hers as she helped him to his feet.  
  
"Hehe yeah well, that was quite a while ago... I feel pretty bad about not coming back sooner, and uh... umm..." Vash couldn't help but look down at the baby on the table now that he was standing. The child had a slightly dark complexion, as if he'd already spent a bit of time out in the sun and earned a tan. Fine, dark, black hair decorated the tiny head, not enough to fully cover all the bare skin quite yet, but close enough. He half expected to look into a pair of dark, troubled, knowing eyes, eyes that had seen too much too soon and would never fully recover the innocence lost. But that was not that gaze that met his. Vash stared into a pair of bright, happy, crystal blue eyes. He played with the child's hand in between his thumb and finger and a familiar smirk spread across the baby's face.  
  
"Nicholas likes you!" Milly announced happily.  
  
"What?" Vash questioned, being drawn back into the present after hearing the name.  
  
"Nicholas, that's his name."  
  
Nicholas... of course! Wolfwood!! He didn't know why it didn't click the instant he first lay eyes on the child. He was simply so caught up in seeing a replica of his dear fallen friend that he didn't realize the obvious. This was Wolfwood's son! Whoa!! But wait... His thoughts were cut off as the baby started to whimper.  
  
"Shh don't worry Nicholas, mommy's here," Milly whispered as she picked up the baby to comfort him.  
  
"Mommy?!" Vash yelled in shock, only to find a hand clamped firmly over his mouth, bringing him to eye level.  
  
"Now now Mr Vash, there will be no yelling around Nicholas, we don't want him to start crying now do we?" Vash nodded under Milly's grip and she put her smile returned. "Good! Now why don't you grab the pudding and we'll all have a picnic on the porch."  
  
Vash grabbed the pudding and followed behind Milly as she carried the baby out through the back door, to the chairs under the shade facing the open desert. "How is it that I never noticed you getting bigger?"  
  
"Well, I never really was one to wear revealing clothes, and besides, you left before I got really big! Meryl nearly had a heart attack!" Milly giggled as she walked. He sat down beside her as she situated Nicholas and handed her the snack. He watched her for a minute or two before he said anything.  
  
"So... you and Wolfwood... well you were..." he couldn't find the appropriate words.  
  
Milly smiled at him. "What are you trying to say?"  
  
"You and him were... lovers?" Vash asked turning a deep crimson.  
  
"Oooh, well... not really," Milly stated simply.  
  
"What? Then how... how did...?" he fumbled motioning to the small baby.  
  
"Mr Priest and I were good friends."  
  
This confused Vash to no end. "But if you were just friends then how did he show up??"  
  
Milly giggled. "Oh Mr Vash, if that's what you were wondering that's all you had to say!" He looked at her blankly and tried to make sense of her. "Well, I had always thought he was a very nice man, and I started to like him in a... well a different way. I suppose he started to feel the same way about me too. I'm not sure when it happened, it was very gradual. But neither of us ever did anything about it. Until the day before..." her smile wavered for a moment, "... the day we had to say goodbye. He was very upset, and so I stayed and talked with him, and after a while we started-"  
  
"Okay!! I mean I think I get the picture, you don't need to add the details," he interrupted abruptly.  
  
Milly giggled a bit then sighed and sat with an unusually reflective look on her face. Vash felt a tinge of guilt for bringing up the subject. "Are you alright? I'm sorry, I didn't mean to bring up something that would upset you..."  
  
"No no, I'm quite alright! It's just..." she let out another sigh. "I wish I had done something about it instead of just playing it cool. I guess that's what I was doing. I can't help but wonder if we'd been more honest about us sooner... if maybe it would've been different. Maybe he wouldn't have been so careless when he was fighting, maybe he would've told us he was hurt, that he needed help, if I'd told him completely and assuredly how I felt, instead of us just stumbling across our feelings like we did."  
  
Silence descended upon the two of them as her words sank in. After a few more minutes Nicholas started getting restless.  
  
"Can I... may I hold him Milly?" Milly smiled a huge grin and handed him over. Nicholas looked at Vash for a few moments before trying to pull on his earring. "Ack!! Well, he's just as dangerous as his dad."  
  
"So Mr Vash, tell me what took you so long!"  
  
Vash told her everything that had happened. The meeting up with Knives, the fight, the victory, the aftermath and recovery. He managed to keep a very positive attitude, even when describing Knives' remarks and arguments with him.  
  
"But wait... where is Knives now?" Milly asked as he finished.  
  
Vash brought his face closer to Nicholas as her played with the baby and rubbed noses with him and laughed happily. "I left him to himself when he was all healed. He's been following me ever since. I don't think he knows I know he's there, since he always tries to keep a great distance. I think he's afraid now... of being alone, of me being right, of knowing I'm right. For once he's afraid."  
  
"Well you certainly do have that effect on people," Milly replied in a chipper tone. Vash looked at her, startled. "Oh! What I mean is... well, I can't really say it correctly... Meryl said it much better than I could. I peeked at her report to the insurance company once a long time ago. I think what she said was something like... you have a way of inspiring people... of making them feel an emotion that they haven't felt in a long time, or perhaps that they lost."  
  
Vash smiled and scratched the back of his neck shyly. "She really said that, huh? I wonder what she must think by now... is... is she mad at me?"  
  
"Mad at you Mr Vash?"  
  
"Well, you're very forgiving about my being gone so long, but what about Meryl? Is she angry with me?"  
  
"Oh no! She's not mad at you," Milly assured him, and he gave a thankful sigh of relief. "But... she was rather sad for a very long time."  
  
"She was?"  
  
"Yes, mostly right around after Nicholas was born. She had to start working more to earn for us while I stayed here, and I think it made her notice the passing of time more. I use to hear her cry, before I came in to try and cheer her up, now she won't even cry when she's in another room."  
  
Vash listened and frowned. He'd made Meryl cry? He sat back and sighed, thinking to himself. He looked off into the desert and let all of the talk they'd just had sink in. Suddenly something stuck out in his mind. Milly talking about Wolfwood. I wish I had done something about it instead of just playing it cool... I can't help but wonder if we'd been more honest about us sooner... if maybe it would've been different. He looked over at Milly as she played with Nicholas. It was bittersweet to watch her kiss the strange reflection of his late friend.  
  
"Milly! I'm home!" a voice suddenly burst through Vash's thoughts. He jumped up, then sat down, then looked around frantically as if trying to find somewhere to hide. Milly giggled and walked in through the back door. She turned back to Vash just before entering and smiled warmheartedly.  
  
"I suppose I should ready a couple places to sleep for our guests."  
  
"Guests?" he whispered back at her.  
  
"Sure! You don't expect I'll let your brother sleep out in the dirt do you?" And with that she walked into the house.  
  
Through the doorway he could hear voices talking. "Well if it isn't Nicholas Demetrius Wolfwood! Has he been good today? Not acting like his father and getting into trouble?" Giggles. "Who were you talking to? Milly? Are you going to answer me?? What's that look all about?"  
  
"Nothing... I think I need to give Nicholas a bath!"  
  
"Milly!" He heard an exasperated sigh and footsteps going towards the open door. He couldn't move, he realized as he sat in his chair looking at the ground, eyes wide. He felt like running but didn't want to, and couldn't, but that didn't suppress the overwhelming urge to high tail it into the desert. The footsteps reached that back door and stopped. He heard her intake of breath, could feel her eyes on him, could smell every bit of her, but couldn't budge an inch, not even to look at her.  
  
"Vash?" he heard in a soft, unsteady, uncertain voice. For some reason, the sound of her voice saying his name broke the spell he was under. He stood slowly and turned to face her.  
  
Her eyes were large and unbelieving. A hand was lifted to cover her gaping mouth. She almost seemed to shake a slight bit. He looked into her eyes and saw... pain. Why was she hurting? Why did she look as if she might run or fall sobbing or both?  
  
"Hi Meryl..." he croaked out. His voice almost squeaked it had gone so dry. She didn't move. He looked at her for a long time, then looked down and started to ramble out as much as her could to try and explain. "I'm sorry I've been away so long. I know you might not believe it but I didn't expect to stay gone as long as that. But I had to help my brother... and... and I had to clear my head. I had to know what I wanted and what I needed to do and..." he stopped and gave a brief laugh. "...and I realized I didn't know what I wanted, but I knew I needed to come back here. That's all I knew. I even got a nervous feeling in my stomach when the town came into view, but not totally in a bad way. And then I got here and the first thing I thought of doing was surprising you and Milly! But turns out I was the one surprised. And when I first saw Nicholas for a split second I was incredibly hopelessly worried that it might have been yours, that you had moved on and forgotten me. But that's stupid because, I mean, it's not like you were mine or anything hehe... were you?"  
  
He turned up hopeful eyes. Everything was hanging on a thread and he no longer knew what to do. He didn't mean to blurt out everything in one confusing mass like that, but he had gotten so nervous he couldn't help it. He stood there, looking up at Meryl in the doorway, holding his breath.  
  
Meryl blinked and realized she'd been asked a question. "I uh... did... wha...?"  
  
Vash almost started to giggle. He took a deep breath and tried again. "Meryl... were you ever mine?"  
  
She got the question that time. Her jaw started flapping but no sound came out, her face turned a bright shade of red and she had to look down at the ground. He could almost heard her pulse racing, it sounded about as fast as his was going.  
  
"I... was hoping... I mean... that is to say... I uh..." she stuttered uncontrollably.  
  
Vash suddenly felt very hopeful, hearing the words she tried frantically to spit out. He took the few steps needed and was next to the doorway, standing on the ground looking up at her. "What if we forget about if you were mine?"  
  
Her eyes widened and she turned frantic. "Nnno no, re.. no I .. n..."  
  
Vash smiled up at her and she suddenly had no speech again. When her mouth stopped trying to work out words, he took one step up so he was looking her straight in the eye, face to face. "Meryl... do you think you could be mine?"  
  
Her eyes closed halfway and became dreamy as her focus switched back and forth between his eyes and his lips. She gave him a nervous, drunken sort of smile, and whispered through a dry throat, "Yes Vash, I think I could, if that's what you want..."  
  
He smiled radiantly and leaned in closer to her, licking his lips, watching her eyes close, and pressed his soft mouth against hers. Meryl leaned back against the doorframe as Vash pushed up against her. In fact, they were so preoccupied, it took a tap on the shoulder to snap them back to reality. Vash turned from a flushed Meryl to see Knives staring up at them with a most confused expression. Meryl gasped and started reaching for a derringer when Milly popped her head out the door.  
  
"If you two are almost done, dinner should be ready in just a little while. Oh! You must be Knives," she exclaimed in an ever-cheerful tone. "I trust Vash will show you where to wash up for dinner, and I will fix up the couch for you if you don't mind sleeping there! And remember, I've just put Nicholas to bed," her voice changed to a dark, serious tone, "so if anyone wakes him up, you're in BIG trouble. Got it?"  
  
Vash saluted as Knives stared slack jawed in shock. Knives leaned over as the girls walked inside, "Is that girl for real?"  
  
Vash grinned widely, "Oooh yes, and she means business too."  
  
The brothers walked inside and Knives closed the door as Vash went running to the table screaming, "DONUTS!!!!!!"


End file.
